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Sid Vicious the Chow Chow
as told by Cherie

Editors note: Follow along in the adventures of Sid Lazarus Cash the Chow Chow. He has his own story teller, Cherie. These stories are important to us as many dogs including Chows have an undeserved reputation of bad behavior. We want you to have first hand news of his daily adventures at the park to meet his adoring public. Come back often for updates! Need Chow Chow information? Visit http://www.chowchow.org/index.html

Sid and Cherie.. Embarrassing Moments.

Sid - Heck with mom this time I am going to tell the story.

I was doing is usual 50 foot zoomies back and forth.. run run run.. to one end, then run run run back to the other end.. Well, a bird caught my attention and I started running fast, faster then I ever have, it took Cherie totally by surprise and when I got to the end of the leash I literally YANKED her off her feet! Cherie flew in the air and landed smack on the ground! Of COURSE that would be the day people were practicing baseball in the field!!  She just lay there to catch her breath while I casually walk back  to ask "WHAT? Can't you keep up?"

Narrator - Zoomies, Chow Chow running back and forth at full speed with no regard to anything or anyone.

 

 

Sid and Cherie... Our Friend Sophie Embarrassing Moments.
 

When I was lucky enough to find our park, I started taking Sophie there for off leash training as well as fun. We worked on “leave it”, “come here”, “stop”, the essentials. Some hand signals. She was quick to learn, and very willing at that point to please me, since we got to come to such a fun place. This place is ideal for such training, bounded on three sides by creek and on the fourth by woods, it’s fairly secluded. Unfortunately, there is every once in a while, someone who thinks it’s more secluded than it actually is.

So, Sophie and I are bopping along enjoying nature, and I notice something up ahead on the ground. At first I thought it was trash, and moved ahead to pick it up. On closer inspection, I saw that it was clothing... looked like a laundry hamper had exploded... and a couple enjoying nature in their own special way. 

I had two options:
1. turn around and go the other way
2. walk by quickly and quietly and get on with our walk
I chose the latter. Why not? Sophie was very obedient, she would follow me without question, right? And this is our park, right? So, red-faced, I signaled for her to follow and scurried up the path, not even daring to look behind me. Halfway up the path, I notice that my chow is missing.

I turn around, and there she is, observing THE MOST INTERESTING THING SHE HAS EVER SEEN. Wiggling with delight, tail wagging, her eyes bright with curiosity, and not paying one bit of attention to me. I start gesticulating wildly, trying to get her attention. Nothing. She looks straight at me, then moves in for a closer look. More furious hand signals from me, and it’s a wonder I didn’t bring down a plane with all my semaphore-like hand motions. Nada. And just when Sophie is three inches away from applying her purple tongue to an un-tanned body part....

“SOPHIE, COME HERE RIGHT NOW!!!!” At the top of my lungs, birds wheeling out of the trees in terror, a shower of leaves and small twigs, and the ground quaking underfoot from the force of my screeching. Then, and only then, does she come running.

I think the most disturbing part of the whole ordeal is that the couple merely rolled over like a pair of lazy raccoons, glanced at us briefly, and continued doing what they were doing.

Sophie danced up to me, eyes sparkling, as if to say, “Did you see that? I didn’t know humans did that, too! I saw two squirrels doing that once....” and so on.

Sophie - I like when mom takes me to the park, the things that humans do just amaze me. This story I had to trick mommy in to sharing.

So, Sophie and I were walking down the path to the field a couple of weeks later, and we saw one of our dog walking acquaintances shaking a tree. Not something you see every day, so I asked him what he was doing. He had been training his lab as a hunting dog for some weeks, was using a toy for him to fetch and retrieve. He had somehow snagged the toy in the top of the tree and was trying to get it down. He had been there some time, there were leaves everywhere. A little too ambitious with the throwing, I thought... the dog wasn’t all that bright to begin with, not likely he was going to fetch that.

I walked over to the side of the path and picked up a long branch for him to knock the toy down with. Two seconds later, he had the toy, and I was congratulating myself for solving his problem for him. “Men... so cute and so clueless. What would they do without us?”, I was thinking, really giving myself the old boost. While I was ego-stroking myself, Sophie ran ahead a bit. There was something white laying in the path in front of the scene of illicit lover's crime... oh, no, not AGAIN! Deja Vu! I called her to me, and clipped on her leash (I’m no fool) and briskly walked to where the white thing was. It was a pair of underpants. They looked familiar. They were mine.

Before you jump to any conclusions, let me explain.

The weather had turned cool that week, and I had gotten into the bad habit of shucking my dog walking jeans into a corner, before jumping into the bath in the evening. The next morning, I snatched up the same jeans and hurriedly put them back on to wear to the park. Unfortunately that day, there was a little hitchhiker from Victoria’s Secret in one of the legs.

So, my problem solving skills might have been a little better than that guy’s on that particular day, but not only did he he most likely see my scanties, his Labrador retriever probably wore them on his head.

I ease my head around and yep, he's still standing there, grinning.

So, I’m standing there, fighting ignorance with my underpants in my hand, and I did the only thing a sensible person could do. I buried them under a rock. And ran.

My humiliation was complete.
 

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Sid and Cherie.. Our Friend Bama With Broken Toys.

Sid - Meanwhile down south my good chow friend Colonel had his own moment. He broke his sisters favorite toy. Story as told by his mom.

We had a crisis here today...

Colonel broke the squeaker in Princess Buttercup's favorite squeaky bone! Filled with fear that Princess  Buttercup would have a seizure without her favorite  squeaky bone at her side, in a panic, I rushed to  the store to replace her squeaky bone! The normally 10 minute drive, seem to take forever...  at least 11 minutes! Why, was this happening to me???  Finally, with the store entrance in sight, I ran feverishly toward the front door! What is this, a rug??
 

Oh no...tripping over the rug and up into the air I went, down onto my back side!! "That's gonna leave a mark" I thought to myself! I couldn't let a broken back stop me,  I was on a mercy mission!! Unable to walk, I crawled through the doorway! "No pain, no gain" I mumbled.  Crawling to a nearby bas-cart, I shifted my body and lay across the the bas-cart's bottom guard plate, I rolled myself toward the toy aisle, running over my own fingers with each turn of the wheels, and dragging my numb legs behind me. Pushing, straining, sweat, blood, and tears,  I could see the toy aisle in the distance! Finally, there I was, blood soaked, but determined...face to face with a whole aisle of toy upon toy! Shiny, colorful, chewy, bouncy, squeaky TOYS!!  What's this? ...OMG, they don't have a squeaky bone just like the one Princess Buttercup had?? What am I going to do? "N0000000ooooooo", I screamed toward the sky-(ceiling)!
 

I was frantic!! Like a southern tornado in May, I gathered toy after toy and throwing them into my bas-cart! "NO TOY LEFT BEHIND" shouted! On my way to the check out, I shouted, "out of my way you peasants, this is an emergency". Being the faithful furkid servant that I am, I shoved and kicked my way to the front of the checkout, like dominos people were falling, right and left!  "Yes" I shrieked as I reached the cashier! Boo-Yaah! I threw some money at the register and hurriedly wheeled out to my car. Oh, the traffic...HONK-HONK, "move over moron, I'm coming through" I shouted to the other drivers... "Princess Buttercup is waiting"! Oh, the nerve of these people and their hand gestures, who do they think they are?? People just have no respect these days!! At last...bags of toys in hand,

I storm through my front door! "Princess Buttercup" I shouted..."I hope you like one of these toys...please say you do, Princess" I begged. In all my excitement, I threw all the toys up into the air! The toys, suspended in air, Princess Buttercup, Molly, and Colonel dancing about with visions of sugar plums in their heads, watched as the toys fell in slow motion, like a shower of prisms, the colorful toys fell one by one, to the floor. Molly and Colonel racing to the toys, joyously scanning over them all! Quickly, Colonel and Molly make their selection and run off to play with their new prize! Meanwhile, Princess Buttercup carefully scanning through the new toys.
 

My heart pauses in anticipation, "why hasn't she picked out a toy"? Carefully, Princess Buttercup sniffs one toy, then another. Will she find a suitable replacement for her sqeaky bone...I am worried now! She stops, looks at me, then the toys. My heart sinks! Her eyes penetrating my every being! Then....with disappointment in her eyes, she said, "hmm? I thought I told you to get a new bone for me, just like the one I had? Was that so hard to do? None of these ridiculous toys will do! What were you thinking?"? Of course, Molly and Colonel were as happy as Christmas morning, but Princess Buttercup...well after all she is a Princess. Regretfully, Princess Buttercup was not pleased. NO, I DON'T KNOW WHAT I WAS THINKING???

There are not enough words to express my shame in failing my Princess Buttercup. If it means, I have to spend the rest of my life, searching for a suitable replacement for Princess Buttercup's squeaky bone, I must do so. It has become my life's mission to redeem myself and be in her graces, if it is the last thing I ever do!
 

 

<i SWEETPEA DESIGNS - I my Sid Vicious!!